And really, who can blame him?

I have a confession to make: Laura and I totally got sucked into Dancing With the Stars earlier this year. We were flabbergasted and dumbstruck when Kelly Monaco (and partner Alec Mazo) won, and we tuned in last night to watch the showdown and results of the rematch. During John O’Hurley and Charlotte Jorgensen’s first dance, I had an epiphany.

ME: You know why I like watching John O’Hurley dance with Charlotte?

LAURA: Why?

ME: Because he always looks as though he wants to bang her like a screen door.

16 thoughts on “And really, who can blame him?”

  1. Gee, that is rather crass…..What if she wants to bang him (like a screen door)? Here I thought that you might like watching John and Charlotte dance because they are just plain good. The other couple sucked……

  2. Generally speaking, men don’t like to watch people dance. Furthermore, from what little I know of the series, Mr O’Hurley shouldn’t be too damn fussy on whom he should ‘bang’.

  3. Gee, that is rather crass.

    Well, if you’re looking for class, you’re looking in the wrong place. Crass… that I can do.

    Here I thought that you might like watching John and Charlotte dance because they are just plain good.

    Well, I certainly thought that they were better dancers than all the other couples, which is why I was so astounded that Kelly and Alec won the first time around. However, as was pointed out several times by the judges, John O’Hurley portrays the character of each dance very well. In those spicy Latin dances especially, the character John portrays is a guy who really, really wants to get horizontal with Charlotte.

  4. … from what little I know of the series, Mr O’Hurley shouldn’t be too damn fussy on whom he should ‘bang’

    Just what do you know of the series? ‘Cause John O’Hurley is one fine looking man, and could probably get any of the fillies on that show into his stable. If he weren’t happily married, of course. Which is he is.

    I’m not saying that John O’Hurley would bang Charlotte Jorgensen. As I said, the guy is married. When he dances with her, he looks as though he’d like to. It’s a character he’s portraying and it gives the sense that the dancers are very connected to one another, adding a layer of complexity to the dance that I appreciate.

  5. Unlike yourself, I didn’t get sucked in to watching the series. I do not know if he could out-tap Gregory Hines, or has the dance sequences down pat for Riverdance. What I know has been gleaned from an occasional commercial or articles in magazines. That leaves me completely unencumbered by the thought process on this show.

    Come to think of it, I have no idea who his partner is. Until two minutes ago, I didn’t know what else he had done. Seems quite accomplished.

    When it comes to visuals, Kelly Monaco has it cold. If she can dance, so much the better. Since the audience pulled her from elimination during the series, either there’s something you missed or the general audience did not appreciate the additional layers of complexity.

    Still, if Lola can have an epiphany during a discussion of ‘The Dukes of Hazzard’, why not have one during ‘Dancing With the Stars’? They always lead to a good discussion.

  6. “‘Cause John O’Hurley is one fine looking man…”

    Hmmm; are you saying you want to get horizontal with John O’Hurley? Bang him like a screen door? Guess that would be a different kind of ‘ball room’ dancing…

    I can’t believe I went there.

  7. Hmmm; are you saying you want to get horizontal with John O’Hurley? Bang him like a screen door? Guess that would be a different kind of ‘ball room’ dancing…

    Not at all, but I certainly know a comely chap when I see one.

    I can’t believe I went there.

    Bring me back a t-shirt.

  8. When it comes to visuals, Kelly Monaco has it cold. If she can dance, so much the better. Since the audience pulled her from elimination during the series, either there’s something you missed or the general audience did not appreciate the additional layers of complexity.

    I think the key word there is “general.” As in “hospital.” Never underestimate the power of soap opera fans.

  9. Unfortunately, her character on General Hospital is not all that complex, so her acting skills (even for a soap opera) are substandard- gee, just like her dancing).

    I can’t believe how crass my brothers are….really I can’t…oh wait, yes I can, and now I know where I must get it from…

  10. Unfortunately, her character on General Hospital is not all that complex, so her acting skills (even for a soap opera) are substandard- gee, just like her dancing).

    I’m almost not at all surprised that you are familiar with the character. Do you actually watch soaps at work, or what?

  11. “I think the key word there is “general.” As in “hospital.” Never underestimate the power of soap opera fans.”

    “Unfortunately, her character on General Hospital is not all that complex, so her acting skills (even for a soap opera) are substandard- gee, just like her dancing).”

    If her acting/dancing skills are so sub-par, what idiot chose her as a candidate?

    KJWon and I used to watch “As the Stomach Churns” and “The Young and the Ruthless” with Grandma back in the day. I’ll tell you acting on a soap (even if you can act) does not automatically garnish a popular vote. The best part of watching was listening to Grandma give her ‘favorite’ actors hell.

    I don’t know how the rematch ended. Perhaps you can feel appropriately avenged for all your indgnities having watched her win the original series, for it sounds like your boy trounced Kelly in round one.

    Maybe it was just a play for ratings. A conspiracy of sorts…. Yeah, that’s the ticket.

  12. Youse guys watch WAAAAAAY too much TV…

    Do I? Let’s have a look at my weekly viewing schedule:

    Family Guy – 0.5 hours
    American Dad – 0.5 hours
    The Daily Show – 2.0 hours
    Surface – 1.0 hours
    My Name is Earl – 0.5 hours
    Lost – 1.0 hours
    Invasion – 1.0 hours
    Threshold – 1.0 hours
    Crappy Sci-Fi movie – 2.0 hours
    Total – 9.5 hours

    Now, most (if not all) of that is recorded by the TiVo and watched at a later time. I also fast-forward through 90% of the commercials, which brings a 60 minute program down to about 40-42 minutes (last I checked) and a 30 minute program down to about 23 minutes.

    If we’re conservative and say that 20% of a given time slot is commercials, and I skip 90% of commercials, then I’m spending 82% of that 9.5 hours (7.79 hours) a week watching the boob tube.

  13. No, I don’t watch General Hospital at work, I do watch the Old and Decrepit during my lunch hour, but that is only because that is all that my coworkers will allow on the television. The only thing that I do at work, when I am supposed to be working, is post messages to my brother’s blog…….

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *