Or, if you prefer: for the love of Kelly Ripa’s immaculate part.

As an expectant father with what some have described as an “irreverent sense of humor,” I found Monday’s Penny Arcade ridiculously funny. Now, before you go clicking on that link all willy-nilly, let me first warn you that this particular installment of Penny Arcade might be regarded by some as tasteless and offensive. I don’t want to reveal too much for fear of ruining the joke for those who do opt to read it, but I will say this: it involves the placenta. If the mere mention of that word makes you cringe then for the love of Regis Philbin’s bushy eyebrows do not click that link.

[EDIT: It occurs to me that there is more than one way to interpret “Kelly Ripa’s immaculate part.” I would like to clarify that I am referring to the part in her hair.

Pervs.]

21 thoughts on “Or, if you prefer: for the love of Kelly Ripa’s immaculate part.”

  1. Now, before you go clicking on that link all willy-nilly, let me first warn you…

    Oh, sure. Like proclaiming, “There’s an elephant in the room! … But don’t look at it!”

  2. Oh, sure. Like proclaiming, “There’s an elephant in the room! … But don’t look at it!”

    I think if it as saying, “There is an elephant in the next room. If you like elephants, perhaps you might want to go into the next room. If you’re not at all fond of elephants, please avoid the next room.”

    Only replace “elephant” with “humor involving the placenta.”

  3. I think if it as saying, “There is an elephant in the next room. If you like elephants, perhaps you might want to go into the next room. If you’re not at all fond of elephants, please avoid the next room.”

    Put the warning before the link, ya goober! It’s like saying, “There’s something to see in the next room”, then, as I walk thru the doorway, you P.S. with, “But don’t go in there if you are allergic to land mines”

  4. Put the warning before the link, ya goober!

    I thought about doing that, but I’m not going to take responsibility for your lack of impulse control. I mean, the link is in the middle of the paragraph. Clicking the link before you read the rest of the paragraph is like walking into the next room while I’m still talking. Rude!

  5. [EDIT: It occurs to me that there is more than one way to interpret “Kelly Ripa’s immaculate part.” I would like to clarify that I am referring to the part in her hair.

    Pervs.]

    It seems you are fascinated by the immaculate part in Kelly Ripa’s hair. Or is it the part in her immaculate’s hair? And just when have you seen her ‘immaculate’, anyway? Does Lola know of this? Do the rest of us need to be concerned?

    Dig, dig, dig.

  6. It seems you are fascinated by the immaculate part in Kelly Ripa’s hair.

    My fascination with Ms. Ripa’s hair is only to the extent that I wished to offer readers an alternative to Mr. Philbin’s eyebrows. As Mr. Philbin is more closely associated with Ms. Ripa these days than he is with Ms. Gifford, I thought that referring to “Kathy Lee Gifford’s third-world sweatshop” might be a little… dated.

  7. I thought about doing that, but I’m not going to take responsibility for your lack of impulse control. I mean, the link is in the middle of the paragraph. Clicking the link before you read the rest of the paragraph is like walking into the next room while I’m still talking. Rude!

    Actually, I haven’t clicked on the link yet. I’m scared! Will I be offended? How will I know unless I look? OMG, the anticipation is killing me!!

  8. My fascination with Ms. Ripa’s hair is only to the extent that I wished to offer readers an alternative to Mr. Philbin’s eyebrows.

    Now this begins to get complicated. What do Regis Philbin’s eyebrows have to do with placental humor? That alone should qualify one for a free evaluation, no?

    KJWon has a valid point on the aforementioned link. One could put forth the proposition that the remainder of the paragraph relates best to those who have visited the link. Putting the warning after the link is then similar to putting the bump sign past said bump. It contains the needed information at a time where few can do a damn thing about it.

  9. What do Regis Philbin’s eyebrows have to do with placental humor?

    Not a damn thing.

    Putting the warning after the link is then similar to putting the bump sign past said bump. It contains the needed information at a time where few can do a damn thing about it.

    And yet, at least in KJwon’s case, the warning worked as intended. He has not clicked the link and is scared to do so. Effective!

  10. Indeed, what the hell was he whining about, then?

    A fine question.

    Nonetheless, in the interest of protecting you chuckleheads from yourselves, I have implemented a secondary warning measure to ensure that you are fully aware of the consequences of clicking that link.

  11. Indeed, what the hell was he whining about, then?

    I was making a point!! I thought you had my back! Don’t make me call you a goober, too!

    I have implemented a secondary warning measure to ensure that you are fully aware of the consequences of clicking that link.

    Too late! I clicked! I went there! I chortled on the inside. A little. I was offended that it wasn’t more offensive. All that brewhaha for … so little. What a let-down.

    I like your ‘secondary warning’ system, tho!

  12. I like your ’secondary warning’ system, tho!

    We’re all about the customer service here at KJToo.com. You’ll notice that all the cups in our cafeteria have “Drink from other end” stamped on the bottom.

  13. I was making a point!! I thought you had my back! Don’t make me call you a goober, too!

    And a good point it was. I had your back and your left flank. Yet he walked in straight up the middle and whupped on ya.

    Atomic batteries to power! Turbines to speed! Ahead full stop!

    Now I suppose I need to go check out the secondaries.

    Rattenfrattenmumblegrumble.

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