KJToo

The new season of The Round Table podcast focuses on building worlds for fiction and role-playing games. The season will consist of a series of discussions with authors, world creators and gaming enthusiasts, all leading up to International World Creation Month (IntWoCreMo for short) in January 2007.

Episode one is an introduction to the new season; Mick and Chris comment on their experiences at GenCon, we respond to listener feedback (including some discussion about Snakes on a Plane), outline our plans for the podcast in the upcoming months, and then dive right into a discussion about different approaches to world creation with guest co-host Julia.

If you haven’t listened to The Round Table in the past, this episode is an excellent opportunity to start, as it represents a reboot of sorts; an opportunity to take the show in an exciting new direction while still keeping the mythic themes that are the heart of the Harping Monkey.

Download Season 3, Episode 1.
Subscribe to The Round Table feed.

Posted August 31, 2006 Comments(0)

The penultimate episode of Who Wants to Be a Superhero? was a mix of good and bad, with a heavy dose of ugly.

The Good

The challenges were actually decent this week.

First, the heroes made an appearance at an elementary school, where they were presented with a poster-sized version of the cover for their own comic book. After the unveiling, each hero spoke to the youngsters and answered their questions. Feedback explained how he got his powers, Fat Momma told the kids that their differences make them special, and Major Victory expounded upon the aerodynamic qualities of his hair.

After each hero had been given their moment in the spotlight, Stan Lee asked the kids to stand behind their favorite costumed crusader. Fat Momma had the most fans, while Feedback — whose presentation was a bit complex for young children — came in a distant third1.

The second challenge took place on the Universal CityWalk at Universal Studios Hollywood. The heroes were informed that Dark Enforcer was loose somewhere in the vicinity and only by following a series of clues could they locate him and foil his fiendish plan.

The first clue led the heroes to a woman wearing high heels with a tattoo above her ankle, who provided the next clue and a bottle of lotion. The second clue led to a heavyset man with a diamond earring; the third clue was written on his belly and back and could only be revealed by rubbing the lotion on him (or else it gets the hose again). The third clue led to a woman with a fancy purse containing thirty-seven dollars and fifty cents and the final clue, which revealed the location of Dark Enforcer.

Major Victory, as always, was hilarious as he ran through the CityWalk in search of each clue. Of all the heroes, Victory has been the most fun to watch since day one. From his mannerisms to the way he moves to the way he interacts with the citizens he seeks to protect, Major Victory has always been a consistent, colorful and dynamic character.

Feedback took the challenge very seriously and even though he’s not as fun to watch as Victory, he’s got the right attitude about being a hero. Upon finding the final clue, Feedback had an opportunity to win the time trial (though he wasn’t aware of it at the time) but stopped to pick up the coins he’d dropped and put them back in the woman’s purse before running off to find Dark Enforcer.

Major Victory and Feedback both completed the challenge in a little over fifteen minutes; Fat Momma, on the other hand, wandered around the CityWalk bumming french fries and chicken strips from various people while searching for the clues. Later, Stan Lee reported that it took Fat Momma forty minutes longer to locate Dark Enforcer than the other contestants.

The Bad

The challenges only lasted about half an hour.

Previous episodes generally consisted of a challenge followed by an elimination in the first half hour, followed by a second challenge and another elimination. With only three heroes left at the beginning of the show and another episode yet to come next week, there was only room for a single elimination in episode five. The elimination, of course, occured at the end of the episode. Unfortunately, both challenges had been completed by about 9:35, which left twenty-five minutes for…

The Ugly

As I mentioned last week, my theory of reality television is that the amount of drama is inversely proportional to the number of contestants remaining. The final half of episode five of Who Wants to Be a Superhero? certainly reinforces that theory; all three of the remaining heroes brought the melodrama to levels that would make your average daytime soap opera wince with embarrassment.

First, Fat Momma locked herself in the bathroom and refused to come out until she could speak with one of the show’s producers. It seems that Fat Momma was concerned that Feedback would not handle losing well, so she wanted to withdraw from the show. Eventually, Major Victory and Feedback came in for a big, weepy hugfest and Fat Momma decided to remain in the contest.

Then came the elimination. Stan called all of the heroes forward onto the red blocks, citing each of their failures: Feedback didn’t communicate with the children on their own level, Fat Momma didn’t take the CityWalk challenge seriously, and Major Victory — for all his enthusiasm — was not so much a hero as he was a parody of a hero. In the end, Major Victory was eliminated for the traits that made him so much fun to watch.

In a final fit of orchestrated tear-jerking, Stan arranged for a phone call between Major Victory and his estranged daughter. The “reconciliation” was almost as painful to watch as Fat Momma and Feedback holding hands as they waited to see which hero would be asked to leave or Lee’s “breakdown” at having to eliminate Victory.

And so the final episode will be a showdown between Fat Momma and Feedback. I don’t know if I can handle a full hour of their sob-sodden interactions and I’ve given up hope that Dark Enforcer is going to manage anything more dastardly than short-sheeting the heroes’ beds; but I’ve made it this far and I’m committed to watching the finale, even if doing so makes me want to burn every comic I’ve ever read in the hopes of eradicating the taint of what Who Wants to Be a Superhero? has become.

1. Word of advice to Feedback: You get your powers from video games. Pong shouldn’t even be on your list of favorite games, much less at the top. [back]

Posted August 26, 2006 Comments(3)

Back in April, I mentioned that I was very much hooked on the podcast novel 7th Son: Descent by J.C. Hutchins. I had started listening to the novel in preparation for having J.C. Hutchins on The Round Table and very quickly found myself drawn into the story.

Throughout the summer, I waited patiently for each new episode to appear in my personal feed from Podiobooks, and 7th Son shot to the top of my “Must Listen” list.

The story revolves around seven men who are abruptly pulled out of their normal lives and brought to a top secret facility where their true history is revealed. The seven men couldn’t be more different—from the hardcore marine to the musician to the computer hacker, the geneticist and the criminal psychologist—but they soon find out that they have more in common than anyone could have guessed. In fact, they are all clones of a man known as John Alpha, who engineered the recent assassination of the President of the United States.

Alpha’s intentions are unclear, but he leaves a trail of clues that only the clones—with their unique skills and their shared childhood memories—can decipher. Alpha has also kidnapped the clones’ “mother,” providing further incentive for them to unravel the mystery and follow their progenitor’s twisted path.

7th Son is a tight, gripping thriller with a healthy dose of near-future science fiction thrown in for good measure. Hutchins not only dives head first into cloning and its ramifications (one of the clones is Father Thomas, a Catholic priest who fears that he and his brethren have no souls), he also delves into memory transference and storing an individual’s personality and experiences in a massive supercomputer.

Descent covers a lot of ground, with tendrils of the story reaching out all across the United States and beyond, to military installations in the former Soviet Union. John Alpha has enlisted the aid of a mercenary named Doug Devlin, and in doing so has created his own personal army. To what end? The first book does not reveal the intricacies of Alpha’s plot, but there are two more installments to come.

Book Two, subtitled Deceit is set for release in late September. As with Book One, Deceit will be released in weekly installments, a format that has worked incredibly well so far. Every chapter ends on a cliffhanger, or with some new revelation that leaves the listener hungry for more. If Hutchins can maintain the momentum he built up in Descent, Book Two is bound to be one hell of an exciting roller coaster ride.

Posted August 22, 2006 Comments(8)

The first episode of SciFi Channel’s superhero reality series was much better than I expected, but the show has been on a steady decline since. With episode four, Who Wants to Be a Superhero? has become the show I was afraid it would be from the beginning.

The transformation of Iron Enforcer to the super-villain, Dark Enforcer, continues to be a disappointment. This week, Dark Enforcer interviewed the friends and family of the heroes to dig up some dirt on the do-gooders. It turns out that eco-friendly Creature has been a bit of a litterbug in days gone by, Fat Momma isn’t always so body-positive, Major Victory may or may not have worn a thong, Lemuria isn’t above using her sex appeal to get what she wants1, and Feedback has a very messy desk.

Here’s a tip for Dark Enforcer: Villains don’t interview the people closest to heroes, they kidnap them. Fat Momma’s momma should be cooling her heels in a non-descript storage container on the docks, Feedback’s wife should be tied to a chair and videotaped pleading for her life, and the other heroes’ so-called “friends” (who were only too eager to rat out their buddies) should be dangling over vats of acid and toxic chemicals. Come on, Enforcer, grow a pair and get with the program!

Unfortunately, the obnoxious hero turned gutless villain isn’t the only factor contributing to the downward spiral of Who Wants to Be a Superhero? The heroes faced two challenges this week; the first wasn’t bad, but the second was simply ridiculous.

Given a little time to themselves, the heroes took to the streets, intent on helping Joe and Jane Citizen muddle through their daily lives. Creature gave clothes to the homeless, Major Victory helped little old ladies cross the street, Lemuria thwarted jaywalkers and Feedback protected children from the evils of storefront lingerie displays.

Back at the lair, Dark Enforcer sprang his evil interviews on the surprised heroes and Stan Lee chastised each of them in turn, then asked Major Victory, Fat Momma and Creature to step forward and defend themselves. In the end, Creature’s apparent hypocrisy and her illegal activities earlier in the day (she jaywalked while delivering clothing to the homeless) were the deciding factors; she was asked to turn in her costume.

The second challenge was simply ludicrious. The heroes traveled to a prison, where they were given secret goals to accomplish while interacting with the inmates.2 The secret goals were:

1. Sit on the inmate’s lap for ten seconds. Lemuria immediately chose this goal.
2. Brush the hair off the inmate’s face three times. This one went to Fat Momma.
3. Rub the inmate’s shoulders three times. Major Victory selected this one.
4. Hug the inmate three times. Feedback chose this goal.

The purpose of this challenge was ostensibly to test the heroes’ ability to perform a “covert operation under stressful conditions,” and the convicts were to provide the stress. Prior to interacting with the inmates, the heroes had to sign a statement wherein they accepted liability for conditions “including, but not limited, to bodily injury, hostage situation or death.”

The problem with this challenge is that there was nothing inherently heroic about it. Take Lemuria’s covert assignment, for example: the only time sitting in someone’s lap should ever be considered heroic is when you are two years old and the lap in question belongs to a mall Santa Claus. Lemuria was none too subtle, waiting all of five seconds before attempting to saddle up. This didn’t go over well with her assigned convict, a surly, burly woman. I suspect the other inmate, an equally surly and just as burly man, would have been far more receptive to the idea of having the scantily-clad heroine park her bottom on his knee.

Fat Momma, Major Victory and Feedback all fared much better than Lemuria, each of them managing to accomplish their covert tasks despite the inmates’ uncooperative attitude. Watching the heroes struggle to complete their assignments, it seemed that the purpose of the challenge was more to ridicule to contestants than to prove their mettle.

Later, on the roof of the secret lair, Stan Lee called Major Victory and Lemuria forward. Lee again chided Major Victory, claiming that “a superhero never takes off his costume under any circumstances.” During the inmate challenge, Victory had removed his cape and gloves after the convict said he looked like an idiot.

The issue with Major Victory’s costume and clothing has come up before; in an earlier episode, another hero criticized Victory for having been a male stripper in the past, and near the beginning of episode four Major Victory removed his cape, laying it at the feet of the little old ladies a la Sir Walter Raleigh as he helped them cross the street.

To borrow an idea from Stephen Colbert, I’m putting Stan Lee on notice. Why? Because every single time Stan Lee addresses the heroes, he does so via video monitor from a remote location, and mounted on the wall behind him is a poster of Stripperella, the stripping superheroine Lee created for Spike TV in 2003.

Though her show aired for only one season, you can be certain that Stripperella removed more than her gloves and cape in both her civilian guise as dancer Erotica Jones and in her role as an agent of F.U.G.G.3 Perhaps Stan Lee needs to have a look behind him before he wags a finger at Major Victory again.

Despite being on the chopping block twice this episode, Major Victory managed to survive. In the end, it was Lemuria — the only hero to fail the inmate challenge — who had to turn in her costume.

Lemuria’s departure was just as melodramatic as Ty’Veculus’ in episode three. In fact, the entire show has become weighed down with the kind of weepy, sniffling, overblown drama that inevitably creeps into reality programs as the number of contestants drops. Unfortunately, it’s only going to get worse, as next week promises “the elimination so tragic it breaks Stan ‘The Man.’”

There are three heroes (Fat Momma, Feedback and Major Victory) left and only two episodes remaining. Despite the show’s descent into melodramatic farce, I’m curious enough to continue watching. I strongly suspect that Feedback will be the victor, if only because his hero would make the best story for a SciFi Original movie.

1. How this could come as a shock to anyone is beyond me; in her original costume Lemuria was one jiggle away from a citation for indecent exposure. [back]
2. A disclaimer in the show’s end credits revealed that the inmates were actually actors, but assured that the heroes were unaware of the ruse. [back]
3. I have no idea what it stands for. [back]

Posted August 20, 2006 Comments(3)

After we saw Snakes on a Plane last night, Chris Miller and I did a quick, two-minute audio review which has been posted to The Round Table and Escape Pod feeds. If you’re subscribed to either of those (and fans of speculative fiction should definitely be subscribed to Escape Pod), it’s probably already in your podcatcher. If you’re not a subscriber, here’s a direct link to the review.

Posted August 18, 2006 Comments(0)