Allow me to elaborate: In the halcyon days of fast food roast beef, Arby’s offered a barbecue beef sandwich called the Arby-Q. Then, they didn’t. I wandered in to the Arby’s in Painesville one afternoon to find that my go-to sandwich was no longer on the menu. What was I left with? Beef ‘n’ Cheddar, that’s what. Beef ‘n’ Cheddar. Now, don’t get me wrong, the Beef ‘n’ Cheddar is a fine sandwich—when I wanted to change things up a bit, I would get the seventeen Beef ‘n’ Cheddars for a nickel deal (a nickel went a long way back in the late 1990s)—but it’s certainly no Arby-Q. I was understandably dismayed; more so when I discovered that the little comment cards you fill out don’t go directly to your congressman but rather to management of the local franchise, who are wholly incapable of introducing the legislature necessary to ensure that the Arby-Q remains on the menu until the sun goes supernova.

It was a dark time.

Then, Arby’s brought the Arby-Q back and…well, this is where the analogy really falls apart, because they only brought it back for a limited time and it really wasn’t the same Arby-Q I remembered—the barbecue sauce was just…off—but for a brief, shining moment it seemed as though everything was going to be all right again, and order had been restored to the universe.

So I guess right now I’m just hoping that no one has been messing with Chris’ sauce.

IHOJ Game Night (now with extra Miller) was very fun, as always, according to prophecy.